Do you have good eng-glis eskills?

I hope this is a joke, but i doubt it is.
[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1OoCjEnQ658]

Are you eh-teen to twenty one years old?
Do you have good eng-glis eskills? A plisant personality and a desire for an exciting new life?
Ep so, this ofortunity mee-bee for you.
Ef this sounds enteresting, please emel us so we can arends a personal enterview.
Tenks!

I feel guilty that I laughed. Japanese are worse than us when it comes to spoken English. So are most other Asian countries. But I doubt they laugh at their own.

So I ask you dear readers: since we consider English as our second language, definitely our medium of instruction at schools, and we claim to be the best call center agents, is it bad to laugh at things like this? Am I bad because I laughed (the Tenks part really got me)? Natawa ka din ba?

condoms: the long and short of it

Health Secretary Esperanza Cabral is in trouble with the Catholic Church. She has earned the ire particularly of Lipa Archbishop Ramon Arguelles for the Department of Health’s initiative of distributing condoms, most notably during Valentine’s Day this year.

“It is immoral for a government official to support the distribution of condoms which we know do not really reduce or stop the spread of HIV-AIDS.”

(Archbishop Cabral) said the way to stop the spread of the disease was to follow the teachings of the Church and to respect the sanctity of the human body.

There are three points raised here, and it is important to break it down, as compound generalizations like this do not lend themselves to easy arguments: (1) that condoms are immoral; (2) that condoms do not reduce or stop the spread of HIV-AIDS, or STDs in general; and (3) that the way to stop the spread of the disease is by following Church teachings and respecting the sanctity of the body, which is to say monogamy and abstinence is the way to go.

I do not have the numbers nor the data for number two, so I cannot argue with it. As to condoms being immoral, I will presume the Archbishop said this because he believes it promotes premarital sex and promiscuity. To some extent I think it does, but I don’t imagine the scene being “Uy, may condom ako, makahanap nga ng makaka-sex!” but rather, “Uy mukhang makaka-iskor ako ngayon, may condom ba ako o wala?” and subsequently, “‘Di bale nang wala, mag-iingat na lang kami.”

Point being, unmarried people are already having sex, condoms or no condoms. I do not see these people suddenly having elevated reproductive hormones just because they got their hands on a condom. No, they are just horny, period. Which leads us to number three …

Yes, monogamy and abstinence is a way to stop the spread of the disease … but it surely is not the ONLY way. And the DOH is not claiming that using prophylactics is the ONLY way to go either. They are just helping in what capacity they can, according to the mandate given to them as part of the executive branch of our government. I do not understand why there is a need to condemn one’s effort when clearly, the DOH is not offering it as the only solution, but as a practical option that is in tune with the times. Puwede namang work together ‘di ba, bakit kailangan mag-condemn?

Practicality dictates that we all should move with the times. The Catholic Church has done so on some topics, like believing in aliens or extraterrestrial beings. Supporting the use of condoms does not have to mean that Catholic values have to be set aside. Let us put our efforts in finding common grounds for issues like these, rather than bashing each other.

Amen?

The Internet? Bah!

http://www.newsweek.com/id/106554

Interesting how one expert viewed the Internet back in 1995. Written by Clifford Stoll, astronomer and hacker tracker (see below), he started by saying that virtual communities and online libraries are ….

“Baloney. Do our computer pundits lack all common sense? The truth is no online database will replace your daily newspaper, no CD-ROM can take the place of a competent teacher and no computer network will change the way government works.“

“Then there are those pushing computers into schools. We’re told that multimedia will make schoolwork easy and fun. Students will happily learn from animated characters while taught by expertly tailored software.Who needs teachers when you’ve got computer-aided education? Bah. These expensive toys are difficult to use in classrooms and require extensive teacher training.

He now sells the popular blown glass Klein bottles online, yet he used to say about e-commerce …

“Even if there were a trustworthy way to send money over the Internet–which there isn’t–the network is missing a most essential ingredient of capitalism: salespeople.”

Goes to show that being smart does not make you immune to epic fails.

Clifford Stoll is a US astronomer who became a Systems Administrator at a Berkeley Laboratory under the US Dept. Of Energy. It is here where he played a critical role in catching the famous hacker Markus Hess. It was during the latter part of the Cold War that the KGB engaged the services of Hess to steal information from the US.

The above utterances are further elaborated in his 1995 book called Silicon Snake Oil.

Eto na, nagsisimula na …

No security marks on ballots for ARMM

“MANILA, Philippines—The security of nearly two million ballots for voters in the Autonomous Region in Muslim Mindanao (ARMM) may have been compromised after they were printed without the security markings of the National Printing Office (NPO), the Inquirer has learned.

An NPO source confirmed that the ARMM-bound ballots for the May 10 general elections had no NPO security features. The autonomous region consists of the provinces of Basilan, Lanao del Sur, Maguindanao, Sulu and Tawi-Tawi.”

Garci was the Election Commissioner at ARMM during the “Hello Garci” scandal. GMA called up Garci to “secure” a 1 Million winning margin during the previous presidential election. Maguindanao is part of ARMM … the same place where the administration senatorial line-up won by 12-0. Chavit Singson placed number 1 in that place, while even failing to win in his own constituency.

Eto pa. Between 2000 and 2007, ARMM’s population growth rate, according to a population census, is 5.46%, way above the entire country’s 2.04%. Kumpara sa mga kapitbahay ng ARMM, Zamboanga Peninsula (which has the same population) grew by only 1.83 percent.

Sa Maguindanao, which is part of ARMM, the growth rate is 6.99%, where as neighboring S.Cotabato’s is only 1.5%, Sarangani’s 2.1%, and N.Cotabato’s 2.2%. Isang barangay sa Sharif Aguak town sa Maguindanao ay lumaki ang populasyon ng 13.6%(!) average yearly from 2000 to 2007, kaya ito ay hinati na sa tatlong barangay noong 2007. Dumami ang populasyon sa isang area na sinasabing pinakamahirap na lugar sa Pilipinas, kung saan napakagulo, at sinasabing mataas ang infant mortality rate.

Eto na ngayon ang konek. Sa paglaki ng populasyon na ito, lumabas sa census na higit na mas maraming 18yrs old pataas ang edad kaysa sa pababa. The 18yr old above population is a lot bigger than 18 and below. Eh ano ngayon, tanong niyo?? Eh anong edad nga ba ang voting age natin?

Tumataas ang populasyon (daw), dumadami ang boto.

Tapos ngayon, “nagkamali” sila ng pag-print sa balota na gagamitin sa lugar na ito. And because of this, the Precinct Count Optical Scan (PCOS) that will be used to count the votes at the clustered precinct level cannot read these ballots. So if this is not remedied, and these ballots are used for voting, the counting has to be done manually. The GARCI way.

Even at small offices, or even ordinary students, when they are going to print a very important report or presentation, they do print a draft first, right? But these great people doing the automation of our elections, they printed 1.7 million ballots before they noticed that something is wrong?? I don’t know how their brains function, but i am sure it is functioning perfectly … according to what was asked of them.

2 million a day lang naman pala eh!

War on the air waves: 6 top bets spend P1-B on ‘pol ads’

Data from media monitoring agency Nielsen Media also reveal that from November 1, 2009 to January 31, 2010, or three months before the campaign period officially kicked off on February 9, the total advertising values for TV, radio, and print of just six of the 10 presidential candidates have already amounted to more than P2 billion.

About half of that figure represents the ad buys of Nacionalista Party standard bearer Senator Manuel ‘Manny’ Villar Jr., even though a presidential candidate’s maximum campaign expenditure limit comes up to only P500 million, or P10 per voter.

Pero yung three-month period na yan is not yet start of the campaign period, kaya sabi ng Comelec at ng Supreme Court, they are all cleared. Bayaan natin sila gumastos ng gumastos, kasi sabi nga nung nakalangoy na sa dagat ng basura, pera naman niya yun eh, ‘di ba?

“… the cost of a 30-second primetime TV ad spot at P250,000, with discounts bundled in … a presidential candidate needs to have a minimum of eight ads a day in at least each of the major networks to be able to have name recall.

“… four ads placed on primetime in each of the two top networks – or eight ads in all daily – would work just as well. But even then the amount of money involved is jaw-dropping. “That’s P2 million a day,”

Naglolokohan lang tayo, sinisita pa kunyari ng Comelec, may pawarning-warning pa kuno, eh wala din naman magagawa … o gagawin talaga. Ganito na lang, suggestion lang mula sa isang ordinaryong pedestrian:

• bakit pa ba tayo nagse-set ng campaign period? let them put out ads whenever they want, wala din naman magawa ang Comelec kahit maglabasan ads nila eh. Dinadagdagan lang natin problema ng Comelec, eh ang dami-dami pa dapat asikasuhin niyan na mas importante kesa sitahin ang mga kandidato at mga artistang sumusuporta sa kanila. May automation yata na dapat pinagtutuunan ng pansin kasi parang hindi pa yata plantsado yun, eh halos Marso na ‘di ba?
• bakit ba may limit pa kung ilang minuto o oras lang ang puwede nila ilabas? para daw patas patas lang kahit mahirap o mayaman ang kandidato? Eh kailan ba nagkaroon ng tunay na mahirap na kandidato? Mayaman lahat ‘yan, wag kayong maniwala sa kanila. At tsaka, PERA NAMAN NGA NILA YUN! Bayaan natin ubusin nila! Ang dapat bantayan natin eh pag nakaupo na sila, siguraduhin natin na hindi nila babawiin yung ginastos nila.
• para talagang patas-patas, at para din hindi naman naiirita ang mga nanunuod ng telebisyon, bakit hindi na lang mag-set ng mga time slots sa bawat araw kung saan at kailan ipe-play yung mga commercial nilang nakakairita at leche nakaka-LSS? Gawin sunod-sunod para sa lahat ng presidente at bise, tapos sa ibang slot sunod-sunod para sa mga senator. Para maikumpara ng mga manonood kung sino pinaka-corny, at para may option din tayo na ilipat na lang yung channel pag napanood na natin dati.

Of the top 20 advertisers during that period, only Villar is an individual, the rest are big corporations selling brands/products. He ranked number 14. But even at 14th, the head of ABS-CBN’s Corporate Communications said that that is equivalent to being a “mega” brand.

Di pa binibiliang diyan yung gastos pag-gawa nung ad … bayad sa sumulat ng jingle, production crew, direktor, ad agency, writers. Eh hair and make-up pa ni Villar?

from pcij.org

Quote …

… from the comments section:

“Our government is the biggest terrorist group …

… In our country, there is no difference between criminals and politicians/government officials.”

The sum of all our fears

We have done it again. Although this is not entirely our own fault, we are still responsible for most part of it. Our beloved country, the Philippines, has ranked 10th in the world that is most at risk of a terrorist attack.

This is according to a group called Maplecroft, who, according to their site “analyse, index and map over 100 global risks to help organisations identify risks and responsibilities across operations, supply chains and distribution networks.”

“The Terrorism Risk Index (TRI) has been developed by Maplecroft for companies to assess terrorism risks to their international assets. The index measures not only the risks of an attack, but also the chances of mass casualties occurring.”

Eto mga ka-line up natin: #1 Irag, #2 Afghanistan, #3 Pakistan, #5 Lebanon, #8 Colombia, #9 Thailand, #15 Russia.

What they did not consider was that our country has a separate branch in our government that brings terror to its citizens more than the Abu Sayyaf, MILF, and the Ampatuans combined. We call it the House of Representatives. If they factored that in, we would have been numero uno!

In the House!

How is your Engrish?

The Internet - where information is abundant

Run for your lives!

Quote for the day …

“Kahit sino sa amin ang manalo, basta mapalitan lang yang tyanak sa Malacañang.”

- Jamby Madrigal
Senator and Presidential aspirant

Trapo ka kasi!

As timeless as Jose Rizal’s Noli Me Tangere.

Trapo by Yano

If this violates any property rights, please contact me via the comments section and I will take the appropriate actions.

“Jueteng at illegal logging
May sideline, rape at kidnapping
Dealer ng shabu at uzi
Commander ng private army”

“May ari ng subdivision
Stock holder ng corporation
Landlord na land robber pa
Anak ka ng, bobong tanga!”

“Ang hirap mong hulihin
Lahat kaya mong bilhin
Wala kang silbe
Wala kang silbe sa amin!”

“Trapo! trapo ka kasi
Trapo! trapo trapo ka kasi!”

“Di na binoboto pero nanalo”

“May misis pero siyam ang kabit
Naadik kaya sabik na sabik
Ang kapal mo, hindi ka manipis
Ginugudtaym mo lang ang aming buwis”

“Mas maraming absent kesa sa present
Di ginagawa, kanyang assignment
Mula Lunes hanggang Biyernes
Wala sa Congress, panay ang beauty rest!”

“Ang sarap mong ihawin! Ipalamon sa mga pating
Wala kang silbe!
Wala kang silbe sa amin!”

“Trapo! trapo ka kasi
Trapo! trapo trapo ka kasi!

Di na binoboto pero nanalo”